{"id":3091,"date":"2021-01-19T19:12:43","date_gmt":"2021-01-19T17:12:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/musulauliba.lv\/?p=3091"},"modified":"2021-01-22T21:50:44","modified_gmt":"2021-01-22T19:50:44","slug":"kad-taurini-aizlido-ejam-talak","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/musulauliba.lv\/kad-taurini-aizlido-ejam-talak\/","title":{"rendered":"Kad tauri\u0146i aizlido, ejam t\u0101l\u0101k"},"content":{"rendered":"
Jeb k\u0101p\u0113c ar \u0137ir\u0161iem vien nek\u0101da sald\u0113juma torte nesan\u0101k.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>
5 min las\u012b\u0161anai<\/p>\n<\/div><\/li><\/ul><\/div><\/div>
Rihards & Viktorija Kostigovi<\/p>\n<\/div><\/li><\/ul><\/div><\/div><\/div>
T\u0101 ir gau\u017e\u0101m interesanta pieredze, kad tas notiek ar k\u0101du mums blakus vai ar\u012b ar pa\u0161iem. V\u0113lme smaid\u012bt, dar\u012bt naivas, pat mu\u013c\u0137\u012bgas lietas, sp\u0113ja b\u016bt motiv\u0113tiem un run\u0101t tikai labu par to \u012bpa\u0161o personu m\u016bsu dz\u012bv\u0113, justies k\u0101 2 cm virs zemes, neskatoties uz to, ka ir auksta ziema vai pat pel\u0113ks rudens. \u0160\u0137iet, ka laimes hormoni rodas pa\u0161i no sevis un v\u0113l tik daudz, ka var\u0113tu padal\u012bties vai uzkr\u0101t.<\/p>\n
Past\u0101v interesanti p\u0113t\u012bjumi, kas apliecina un par\u0101da, cik \u013coti iem\u012bl\u0113\u0161an\u0101s fenomens starp diviem cilv\u0113kiem ir liel\u0101 m\u0113r\u0101 \u0137\u012bmisks process, kas notiek katra \u0137ermen\u012b. Un vec\u0101k\u0101s paaudzes bie\u017e\u0101k lietotie termini \u201dnepr\u0101t\u012bgi iem\u012bl\u0113jies\u201d vai \u201ciem\u012bl\u0113jies l\u012bdz aus\u012bm\u201d visai prec\u012bzi apraksta to, kas notiek ar cilv\u0113ku. Noteikti pa\u0161i esam piedz\u012bvoju\u0161i to saj\u016btu, ka esam gatavi dar\u012bt pat lietas, ko racion\u0101lais pr\u0101ts nepie\u013cautu nekad. Var teikt, ka m\u016bsos viss, pat pr\u0101ts zaud\u0113 kontroli un \u2013 ir iem\u012bl\u0113jies.<\/p>\n
K\u0101p\u0113c laul\u0101tajiem \u0161odien gaidot m\u0101j\u0101s savu laul\u0101to vai gatavojoties uz randi\u0146u vairs nelido tie agr\u0101k justie tauri\u0146i? Un kurp dodas \u0161ie tauri\u0146i, kas m\u016bsos virpu\u013co tie\u0161i iem\u012bl\u0113\u0161an\u0101s laik\u0101? J\u016bs ar\u012b esat \u0161o jaut\u0101jumu uzdevu\u0161i? Varb\u016bt jums pat licies, ka kaut kas pietr\u016bkst, jo vairs ar savu laul\u0101to nav \u0161\u012bs saj\u016btas. Varb\u016bt pat iezagusies doma par to, ka vairs nav \u012bst\u0101 m\u012blest\u012bba un ir j\u0101skat\u0101s uz citu pusi, lai atkal izjustu \u0161o k\u0146udo\u0146u pakr\u016bt\u0113? M\u0113s pa\u0161i \u0161o jaut\u0101jumu esam sev uzdevu\u0161i. \u0160obr\u012bd esam piln\u012bgi mier\u012bgi, jo esam sapratu\u0161i, ka m\u012blest\u012bba ir p\u0101rg\u0101jusi cit\u0101 l\u012bmen\u012b un tie agr\u0101kie tauri\u0146i tik augstu vienk\u0101r\u0161i vairs nesniedzas.<\/p>\n
K\u0101 raksta laul\u012bbu konsultants, daudzu gr\u0101matu autors Gerijs \u010cepmens, \u0161\u012bs tirpas ir svar\u012bgas, tom\u0113r t\u0101s nav pietiekams pamats veiksm\u012bgai laul\u012bbai.<\/p>\n
\n\u201cEs nesaku, ka vajadz\u0113tu prec\u0113ties bez \u201ctirp\u0101m\u201d, \u0161\u012bs silt\u0101s, satrauco\u0161\u0101s saj\u016btas, kas uzdzen zos\u0101du, apzi\u0146a, ka tu esi pie\u0146emts, un piesk\u0101rieni, kas izraisa pat\u012bkamu k\u0146udo\u0146u, ir k\u0101 \u0137irs\u012b\u0161i uz sald\u0113juma tortes. Tom\u0113r ar \u0137ir\u0161iem vien nek\u0101da sald\u0113juma torte nesan\u0101k,\u201d sav\u0101 gr\u0101mat\u0101 \u201cKaut es to b\u016btu zin\u0101jis pirms k\u0101z\u0101m\u201d raksta \u010cepmens.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n
Vi\u0146\u0161 skaidro, ka iem\u012bl\u0113\u0161an\u0101s ir \u013coti sp\u0113c\u012bgas un nep\u0101rvaramas emocijas, ta\u010du t\u0101 main\u0101s, un pacil\u0101t\u012bba izpl\u0113n. P\u0113t\u012bjumi mums par\u0101da, ka \u0161is iem\u012bl\u0113\u0161an\u0101s posms vid\u0113ji ilgst 2 gadus. Tas nenoz\u012bm\u0113, ka m\u012blest\u012bba p\u0113c \u0161iem gadiem paz\u016bd, n\u0113, tas liecina, ka \u0161o pacil\u0101t\u012bbas stadiju vienk\u0101r\u0161i nomaina n\u0101kamais m\u012blest\u012bbas posms. To var d\u0113v\u0113t par apzin\u0101t\u0101s m\u012blest\u012bbas posmu. Un tie\u0161i taj\u0101 ir j\u0101s\u0101k ieguld\u012bt vair\u0101k darbs pie attiec\u012bb\u0101m. Tas, kas k\u0101dreiz n\u0101ca viegli, tas tagad ieg\u016bst pieraduma, apnikuma vai pat aizkaitin\u0101juma nokr\u0101su. Tas viss liecina, ka m\u0113s vienk\u0101r\u0161i iepaz\u012bstam lab\u0101k otru un vi\u0146\u0161 \u013cauj ar\u012b mums iepaz\u012bt sevi. M\u016bsos ien\u0101k citas emocijas, nostiprin\u0101s citas attieksmes. Un tas viss ir pareizi, jo m\u0113s att\u012bst\u0101mies!<\/p>\n
\nLatvij\u0101 praktiz\u0113jo\u0161ais psihoterapeits Kaspars B\u0113rzi\u0146\u0161 sav\u0101 FB vietn\u0113 koment\u0113 \u201cAr laiku nokr\u012bt roz\u0101 brilles, un re\u0101lais cilv\u0113ks vairs nemaz tik \u013coti neatbilst savam ide\u0101lajam t\u0113lam, mums s\u0101k \u0161\u0137ist, ka \u201evi\u0146\u0161 ir main\u012bjies\u201d vai m\u016bs \u201epiem\u0101n\u012bjis\u201d. V\u0101rdu sakot, \u201evi\u0146\u0161 vairs nav t\u0101ds, k\u0101ds bija\u201d. \u0160is ir dabisks process, kas notiek piln\u012bgi visiem. Ja tas, kas palicis p\u0113c il\u016bziju zaud\u0113\u0161anas, ir nenoz\u012bm\u012bgs, tad to var viegli nomain\u012bt \u2013 cilv\u0113ki parasti iz\u0161\u0137iras.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n
Kas \u0161aj\u0101 dabiskaj\u0101 proces\u0101 notiek, kas nokauj tauri\u0146us? Visvair\u0101k j\u016bs min\u0113j\u0101t ikdienas rut\u012bnu, pieradumu pie otra, risin\u0101m\u0101s probl\u0113mas, nepiepild\u012btos sap\u0146us, aizvainojumu, kas ien\u0101k. Ar\u012b \u010cepmens apraksta savu pieredzi, ka tad, kad emocion\u0101l\u0101 j\u016bsma noplaka, vi\u0146am pat m\u0101c\u0101s domas, ka apprec\u0113jis nepareizo sievieti, jo, ja b\u016btu bijusi \u012bst\u0101, saj\u016bsma neb\u016btu noplakusi. Tikai ar gadiem un pieredzi, vi\u0146\u0161 non\u0101ca pie secin\u0101juma, ko m\u0101ca \u0161odien p\u0101riem, ka past\u0101v divi m\u012blest\u012bbas etapi. Nav j\u0101b\u0113d\u0101 par to, ka pirmais izgaist, jo j\u016bs vienk\u0101r\u0161i esat n\u0101kamaj\u0101, kur nu ir j\u0101s\u0101k str\u0101d\u0101t. T\u0101tad, ja vairs nej\u016btat \u0161os agr\u0101kos tauri\u0146us, tas neliecina, ka m\u012blest\u012bba ir pagaisusi. Tas noz\u012bm\u0113, turpiniet str\u0101d\u0101t pie sav\u0101m attiec\u012bb\u0101m, neatst\u0101jiet nov\u0101rt\u0101 sevi. R\u016bp\u0113joties par sevi, izskatu, ap\u0123\u0113rbu un att\u012bst\u012bbu, j\u016bs ar\u012b savam laul\u0101tajam dosiet sign\u0101lu, ka vi\u0146\u0161 jums ir svar\u012bgs. Kad j\u016btamies savam laul\u0101tajam svar\u012bgi un noz\u012bm\u012bgi, daudzi simptomi, piem\u0113ram, bezm\u0113r\u0137\u012bgums, motiv\u0101cijas tr\u016bkums un gr\u016btsird\u012bba var izzust. Sviniet apzin\u0101t\u0101s m\u012blest\u012bbas etapu, jo lab\u0101 zi\u0146a ir \u2013 viss ir dots, lai t\u0101 b\u016btu krietni ilg\u0101ka par \u201cdivu gadu tauri\u0146u posmu\u201d.<\/p>\n
Ko saka laul\u0101tie?<\/h3>\n
\nTaure\u0146i visp\u0101r nedz\u012bvi ilgi, ja nu vien\u012bgais tiem tiek rad\u012bta speci\u0101la vide. Bet dom\u0101ju, ka cilv\u0113kam liel\u0101k\u0101 k\u013c\u016bda ir taj\u0101, ka otru uztver k\u0101 savu iegribu apmierin\u0101t\u0101ju, nevis k\u0101 cilv\u0113ku kuram kalpot un dot, bet \u0146emt. Un tas ir vis\u0101s jom\u0101m, gan seks\u0101, gan laik\u0101 velt\u012b\u0161ana uzman\u012bbai, gan kop\u012bg\u0101m interes\u0113m, kas izr\u0101d\u0101s at\u0161\u0137ir\u012bgas. Un visp\u0101r izr\u0101d\u0101s, ka otrs nemaz nav tas ko grib\u0113ji satikt un ar ko grib\u0113ji dz\u012bvot visu m\u016b\u017eu. Probl\u0113ma ir vil\u0161an\u0101s sav\u0101 iedomu pasaul\u0113. Tu biji gaid\u012bjis, ko citu un taure\u0146i aizlido, reiz\u0113m ar visiem \u010demod\u0101niem. Gints & Krist\u012bne Bernecki<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n
\u201cTauri\u0146u, laiks, eiforija, roz\u0101 bri\u013c\u013cu laiks un pat\u012bkamo emociju laiks reiz beidzas\u2026.,tad s\u0101kas laul\u012bbas b\u016bv\u0113\u0161ana. P\u0113c k\u0101da laika pien\u0101k p\u0101rbaud\u012bjuma laiks, ko daudzi neiztur, jo Dievs p\u0101rbauda laul\u012bbas b\u016bvniec\u012bbas pamatus un materi\u0101lus. Viss neder\u012bgais l\u016bzt un br\u016bk. Daudziem m\u016bsdien\u0101s pat\u012bk tas nedaudz eiforiskais laiks un pacil\u0101jo\u0161\u0101 saj\u016bta p\u0101ris cm no zemes, kur emocijas \u0146em lielu virsroku. Tik cilv\u0113ki ir piemirsu\u0161i, ka emocijas ir pagaidu st\u0101voklis.\u201d Mareks Bukovskis<\/strong><\/i><\/p>\n
\nIkdienas rut\u012bna, probl\u0113mas nokauj \u201ctauri\u0146us\u201d v\u0113der\u0101 un ar\u012b izt\u0113lo\u0161an\u0101s un iedoma roz\u0101 brilles. Ikdieni\u0161\u0137\u0101s probl\u0113mas, nepiepild\u012bti sap\u0146i, cer\u012bbas, ilgas p\u0113c kaut k\u0101 \u2013 tas viss pa\u0146em \u201ctauri\u0146us\u201d. Linda Sakti\u0146a Pl\u016bme<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n
Ikdiena p\u0101r\u0146em taure\u0146us. Tas nav nekas slikts, b\u016btu traki, ja v\u0113ders sarautos \u010dokur\u0101 jau vair\u0101k k\u0101 10 gadus katru reizi ikdien\u0101 ieraugot v\u012bru. Manupr\u0101t, vienas no lab\u0101kaj\u0101m z\u0101l\u0113m rut\u012bnai ir joko\u0161an\u0101s. Nav ko dz\u012bvot pag\u0101tn\u0113, ilgojoties p\u0113c pirmatn\u0113jiem taure\u0146iem. Zin\u0101ms taure\u0146efekts ir tad, ja divat\u0101 kaut kur aizdodas. Bet tie nekad neilgst ne gadu vai divus. Ir j\u0101nov\u0113rt\u0113 jaun\u0101s attiec\u012bbu kvalit\u0101tes. Inguna Ke\u010dko<\/strong><\/i><\/p>\n
\nManupr\u0101t, tas ir norm\u0101li, ka pirm\u0101s iem\u012bl\u0113\u0161an\u0101s saj\u016btas, emocijas p\u0101riet. To viet\u0101 iest\u0101jas kas stabil\u0101ks – m\u012blest\u012bba, kas nav atkar\u012bga no emocij\u0101m. Bet j\u0101, es sav\u0101 v\u012br\u0101 m\u0113dzu ik pa laikam atkal iem\u012bl\u0113ties no jauna. Un t\u0101s atkal ir for\u0161as saj\u016btas, bet ne jau uz t\u0101m balst\u0101s laul\u012bba. T\u0101s ir k\u0101 saldumi ikdien\u0101. Visu dienu no tiem p\u0101rtikt nevar! Linda \u017dvinkle<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n
Es dom\u0101ju, ka nevis rut\u012bna tos nokauj, bet m\u0113s pa\u0161i kaut k\u0101 tai piezogoties, \u013caujam tauri\u0146iem lidot prom un dodam tiem br\u012bvbi\u013ceti uz p\u0101r\u0113jo pasauli. Jud\u012bte Ozoli\u0146a<\/strong><\/i><\/p>\n
\nEs nezinu, k\u0101p\u0113c tie paz\u016bd! Min\u0113jums, par\u0101d\u0101s pieradums, ikdiena, tu esi kop\u0101 ar otru un nekas nesp\u0113j tevi p\u0101rsteigt! Bet, ko v\u0113l gribu teikt, tie tauri\u0146i par\u0101d\u0101s arvien no jauna, vismaz m\u016bsu laul\u012bb\u0101! M\u0113s ar v\u012bru kop\u0101 esam jau 18 gadus, no tiem 11 prec\u0113ju\u0161ies, un es joproj\u0101m iem\u012blos sav\u0101 v\u012br\u0101 no jauna, un arvien vair\u0101k. Kar\u012bna Liepi\u0146a<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n
Tauri\u0146u pazu\u0161ana ir norm\u0101ls un neizb\u0113gams attiec\u012bbu transform\u0113\u0161an\u0101s turpin\u0101jums, ja grib mekl\u0113t turpin\u0101jumu. Vita Beinerte<\/b><\/i><\/p>\n
\nJa cilv\u0113ks skrien tikai p\u0113c tauri\u0146iem, tie aizlido, un tu paliec viens. Tauri\u0146i jau nav m\u012blest\u012bba. Tauri\u0146i ir \u012bslaic\u012bgs emocion\u0101ls uzbudin\u0101jums – pirmo reizi uz skolu, pirmo reizi ce\u013cojum\u0101, pirmo reizi iem\u012blies, pirmo reizi uz skatuves utt. Ja nav Dieva m\u012blest\u012bbas, tad var k\u013c\u016bdaini dom\u0101t, ka j\u0101skrien p\u0113c tauri\u0146iem. Mums tapa t\u0101ds piem\u0113rs – ja m\u0113s apz\u012bm\u0113tu tauri\u0146us ar 10 eiro un Dievu ar 1 miljonu. Tad san\u0101ktu – kad nav naudas (Dieva) – tad 10 eiro (tauri\u0146i) liekas liela nauda. Kad tev ir 1 miljons (Dieva m\u012blest\u012bba) – tad 10 eiro (tauri\u0146i) liekas s\u012bkums.<\/p>\n
V\u0113l ien\u0101ca pr\u0101t\u0101 sal\u012bdzin\u0101jums par tauri\u0146iem un upi. Ar\u012b dab\u0101 tauri\u0146i lidin\u0101s apk\u0101rt un ir gr\u016bti tos no\u0137ert, turpret\u012b up\u0113 (Dieva m\u012blest\u012bb\u0101) tu iek\u0101p un esi ap\u0146emts, atspirdzin\u0101ts, stiprin\u0101ts nep\u0101rtraukti. Paliksim tai up\u0113, kurai da\u017ek\u0101rt lido gar\u0101m k\u0101ds tauri\u0146\u0161, svin\u0113sim un baud\u012bsim Dievu un viens otru. Leida Ozolina Kaspara<\/b><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<\/div>
<\/div>Dalies: <\/h4>